Back to list
|
lining up
|
|||
| Posted by Nanda Kumar Thu, Aug 14th 2008, 01:40 :: English | |||
|
four doves on a power line; two white, one brown, one blue-black |
|||
| Swedish translation by Nanda Kumar. Posted on Thu, Aug 14th 2008, 01:40 | |||
|
fyra duvar på en| telefonlinje; två vita, en brun, en blå-svart |
|||
| Hindi translation by Rebba Singh. Posted on Fri, Aug 15th 2008, 09:49 | |||
|
chaar faakhtae bijali ki taar par; doh safaed, ek matmaela, ek neelkaal |
|||
login to post comment.
I read the Swedish version which sounds so eloquent to my untrained ears!
Then an option of adding a verb to the English version suggested itself to me ~
four doves (perch) on
a power line; two white,
one brown, one blue-black
The verb "perch" is implicit of course! But i think this addition enhances the resonances of the haiku & even maybe gives it a little subtle eloquence, a quality of repose !