Comments
Juxtaposition (phrase and fragment) might conjure some surface illusion of poetry but it isn't sufficient to make good haiku. This quote from Narayanan's essay clarifies:

JUXTAPOSITION IN HAIKU

Haiku Uses Contrasting images often to indicate their intrinsic unity in the “Zen Sense” Hence technically a juxtaposition comes often into the structure of the genre. But I feel that this should be intrinsic and not contrived to add excess weight. Some western theoreticians of Haiku even insist on the necessity of forcing the juxtaposition of images in Haiku ~ I was rather amused ~ So I wrote the following one, a sly one perhaps ~ A senryu.

Haiku Guru teaches
sly juxtaposition tricks ~
I watch my sky ~

But of course I use juxtapositions[ intrinsic mutual contrasts] in many Haiku! This is called Toriawase in Japanese. For more Information refer below.

On Toriawase
Susumu Takiguchi
Oxford, UK

http://www.worldhaikureview.org/21/whcschools_st_toriawase.shtml

You can find the full essay here:

http://www.wonderhaikuworlds.com/haikuandgenres-hrr.php


"ambience" (sp).
Shyam Santhanam Wed, Oct 4th 2006, 18:16  
  
Shyam, I agree. A haiku should not be contrived. My only criteria for judging a poem or haiku is if it has an emotional effect on me. Construct them as you may, the end result is all that matters.
Edward Weiss Wed, Oct 4th 2006, 18:20  
  
From ~


http://www.wonderhaikuworlds.com/haikuandgenres-hrr.php




SYLLABLE COUNT ~ NO! Not Necessarily Seventeen!




Many people tend to say, "17 syllables [5/7/5]" and say "Ah! Haiku" ~ But onji[kana] and syllable are very different ~ When Haiku was adapted into English after world-war two, the seventeen syllables came in as an artifice. Most serious ones felt that it is too long and some went in for various options ~ a 11 syllables [3/5/3 partition] count or 10 syllables [3/4/3 partition]. But many felt that it is too constraining and went in for various syllable counts in different partitions into lines. Some extremists even went in for 7 syllable style in a 2/3/2 partition ~ I prefer the freedom that the rhythm dictates. I have written mostly between 11 and 17 syllables, rarely less [even as less as seven syllables ], very rarely even more than 17 syllables [ eighteen or nineteen ] out of some poetic necessity. Following examples perhaps illustrate ~



embracing

the ocean, the sun

vanishes ~





mossy rocks

radiant abloom on

a cloudy sky ~






incense moonlight

blooms tender lotus-silences ~

starry-sky incants air ~






I close my palm

hold tight a breeze, open it,

let out an emptiness ~






spring full-bloom on

car-rear-glass begins

a long pilgrimage ~







incense spring melts on

lucid river ~ country-boat dreams

floral path of light ~






spring breeze blazes

landscape in sunlight ~ sparrows

stream in, in melody ~






rhythm of Fire ~

articulate horizon brews

the first drizzle ~






the sacred drizzle ~

the birds have abandoned

the smell of earth ~






inverted mountain

dazzles on dawn-waters ~

breeze hum erases ~







verdant breeze envelope

spasms ~ solitary autumn

leaf gently falls ~






twilight village ~

temple bell blazes ~ sparrows

tingle silences in mist ~






The following conclusion in a brilliant essay on the topic by Keiko Imaoka is relevant in this context.



“Thus we are in a blind, a catch twenty-two. If one wishes to have the brevity and the fragmented quality of Japanese haiku in English haiku, 17 syllables are too long. On the other hand, if a rigid structure is desired, 11 syllables are too short. One must choose between the two. The choice depends on which of the two factors a poet considers more important to haiku. The majority of contemporary English-haiku poets have let go of the tight forms in favor of brevity to develop the mainstream North American haiku.”



THE FLEXIBILITY OF JAPANESE GRAMMAR


“There are two major linguistic factors that make the Japanese language more flexible, and thus easier to fit into a rigid form such as 5-7-5. Both of these factors derive from the fact that the grammatical units in Japanese are largely independent, and are relatively free to move about within a sentence.


1. RELATIVE FREEDOM OF WORD ORDER


2. RELATIVE EASE IN SEGMENTATION





Please refer to this remarkable essay for a clear statement of the situation. I was little sceptical about the seventeen syllable Haiku but learning with Imaoka’s essay I now consider it as a legitimate alternative to mere brevity.



From


FORMS IN ENGLISH HAIKU


KEIKO IMAOKA



http://www.ahapoetry.com/keirule.htm





Narayanan Raghunathan Thu, Oct 5th 2006, 01:56  
  
Please
login to post comment.